Looking to the Bright Side

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I have to look on the bright side

to think of the good things in my life

for I am healthy and being my best

I know I cannot control the rest

I can just try every day to progress

to feel the love and feel that I am blessed.

 

I have seen disparity and poverty in other lands

I have seen dishonesty and hatred firsthand

I chose to leave so I could continue to expand

my own horizons even though they are unplanned.

 

I just know that the storms are almost over

as I start a brand new chapter

of my life as I gain closure

relinquishing any pent up anger

embracing my new future.

 

Sunny days and blue skies are ahead

I am trading them for the rain and thunder instead

So I can feel the love surround my heart and my head

because I have to enjoy this life before I am dead.

My Own Way

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I always take the guilt,

I always take the blame,

and yet its me to blow out the flame.

 

I try my best up to a point

while I watch you light a joint

by this time I am already done

I’m tired of battling and you’ve just begun

then comes the time to plea and bargain

but I’m not up for sale, this isn’t an auction.

 

I give more chances than I ever should

I look past it all and try to see the good

I know you’re smart and that you’ve understood

then starts the “I could’ve, would’ve, should’ve,”

when all I want is to be free of any falsehoods.

 

I never understand when you act so hurt

after hearing and seeing all of the signs of alert

I prefer the mountains but can handle the desert

but I’m a water baby and won’t convert.

 

So let me be free

let me swim as I please

let me buzz around with the honey bees

reaping life’s bounties

smelling the field of daisies

where I wont be made fun of for driving like its sunday

as it is my mode of life to get lost and enjoy the day

so if you can be a bit carefree, please stay

and if not don’t be hurt when I go my own way.

Diving Deep

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I like to swim around in the currents

on my own, without any deterrents

diving deep to see whats hidden below

then rising above to challenge what I know.

 

There’s so much life in my soul’s canyons

with layers upon layers to recount what has happened

its a tough trek, steep and dry

all by myself but I know I must try

There’s abundance and life at the bottom that’s all mine.

 

At the lowest depths where life abounds

I can jump, fly, relax and swim around

absorbing the love within me that I’ve found

hearing nature’s harmony resound

taking in the beauty that’s so profound 

its all about goodness when you go this far down.

It’s All In My Head

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It’s all in my head

what I’ve seen, what I’ve read

what I’ve heard, what I’ve said

what I’ve consumed, what I’ve been fed

it will be this way until I’m dead.

“It’s all in your head”

but I know what I feel

not all that we see is real

I know there’s more to an orange than it’s peel

I’m on an adventure and I’m at the wheel

I’m not afraid to embrace what others fear

I accept what I know and hold onto it dear.

Energy versus Words

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I react to energy, but am swayed by words.

While living in a foreign land I learned that I can only trust what I feel, not just go by the words that come out of the mouth. I had to learn to read energy to know whether they had good intentions or not… I didn’t learn this straightaway, but finally I learned to trust what I felt, to stand tall with my decision and to do what I had to do…  

I see the expression, I see it in it’s true form.

Like anything, when I see it, its with me

I cannot act like I’ve not seen it even if I try…

 

I try to steer clear of false identities

wolves in sheep’s clothing

and the sheep with fangs

I suggest that it all be taken off

until then – I request that you stay away

I don’t know an easier way to convey

that I only want truth and honesty.

 

I only want those around me who want the same

even in places where I see smiling faces

where words do not erase the incongruent

actions of thier body

so please step back away from me old friend

people change i understand

but for christ’s sake don’t try to force

something that isn’t there… whats the point?

 

I want to be true to me

and I want those around me to be true to them too

hopefully we can come together later

on a healthy platform to share what we’ve learned

to exchange ideas and thoughts we’ve earned…

Thought on Being Legally Bound…

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Is there any thing really wrong about being selfish, developing one’s self first and making that a focal point and continuing to do so as time progresses? How much does one really need to compromise in a relationship? Is a companion all that we can ever really seek in life?

Is there really just one person who will fulfill that gap when you need it? Is that even possible? Can we just get what we need from other people when we need it? Take only what we need and give, if we can, what they are in need of in return? Or further, just give what we need to give, what we can give…

A continuing thought… most likely spurred because I myself have found that I am legally bound, granted in another country, however, still legally bound and in the midst of breaking free from something I shouldn’t have really entered in the first place…where I allowed legal hoops and repercussions to scare me into thinking that I needed to be married to someone whom I did love and was in a relationship with in the said foreign country… masking it with the thought and optimism of love while knowing that if the legal ramifications and country laws were not as they were I wouldn’t have entered…  

Returning to the thought… with divorce in the US being 1 in every 2 marriages ending, doesn’t that mean that we are not as tied into religion as we were? Specifically California having the highest rate of divorce… doesn’t that reflect the lax religious views here? Doesn’t that also lead to the idea that we are more inclined to do what makes us happiest, even if that entails divorce, ending the religious institution of marriage that society tells us we should enter.

Further with divorce, how is it that we are supposed to feel so guilty about it? It is just a religious institution, and if I am not a strict follower of religion and my life is not ruled by religion, should I feel guilty? Should I feel guilty if I no longer feel the way I once did? Should I feel guilty that I have grown into a different person? I don’t think that guilt does me any good at all… why should I take it on when I am not obligated?

It is only my life to live. Shouldn’t I do what makes me happiest in this world? My world is only what I make it and if the person who I am next to doesn’t fit into what I believe I need next to me, is it wrong to be selfish and change the environment? We are all individual anyway… who is to say that the other person will ever be so much like you that you truly can grow old with only them? If I feel like I am on my own path to do the right thing and I realize that includes freeing myself from the bonds of those kinds of relationships, then shouldn’t I do it? Won’t it, in the long run, make the world a better place because I am doing what makes me happiest, what I feel is the best thing I can do for myself to help create this environment of happiness?

Why is it that our society forces us to be legally bound in order to have rights like health care? Health care should be a given right for any citizen living in the world’s most powerful and influential nation. So if you have to get married to have health care, that means that religion and capitalism are tied since health care seems to be totally revolving around money now? Is that a fair assumption?

I can definitely say that I will be more cautious when entering any kind of contract in the future, but in our society doesn’t it almost seem like it is inevitable in order to have rights? Is this where the gay/lesbian rights come in… how unfair that society makes us do this anyway for heterosexual couples, let alone homosexual ones, it is almost like a double blow… isn’t it? Or is it just the same… people who have a different outlook and who just want to love and have rights while living within their own bubble in our current society?

Bubble Time-Lapse

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You drew me in

as I pulled you too

like a magnet to the metal

like a fish to the choral

I wanted to share my bubble time-lapse

I sat upon your lap

I closed all noticeable gaps

wrapped my body around yours

embracing every physical contour

we closed our eyes

let our energy build like a city high rise

the sunrise began slow and it opened our skies

 

yet someone from outside

interrupted with redeyes and whys

I asked politely that they be quiet and just stand by

they didn’t understand but reluctantly complied

after I explained that the moment needed to happen first

where its natural and unrehearsed 

so we can totally be submersed

letting the love and energy quench our thirst

 

we won’t need any drugs

we’ll be high from our hugs

we’ll dance all night in the grass or on the rug

while chasing around the flashing lightening bugs

Perspective

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Life is all about your perspective… if you think you are some way… if you follow that way taking on its nuances… you will be that way. Thus, those around you will treat you that way because you are that way. Perspective… I can have and be in any way/life/path/reality I choose. Always. When you think that way you become that way…

If this is true… then always choose the best way, the one where you feel the most love… and you will in return get the most love because it is starting from within you first… and if you can start from within it will all work itself out just as it is supposed to be… you just have to embrace your true nature…